May 14, 2024

Hi Tina,

We've all faced moments in our careers and personal lives where things just didn’t seem to go our way—uninspiring jobs, difficult coworkers, or feeling stuck on our career path. It's tempting to think these external factors are calling the shots. However, the real power lies in focusing on what we can control. This month, I'm excited to share an article that delves into how shifting our focus from external barriers to personal empowerment can make a massive difference in our lives. Let's explore how we can turn things around!

To your success,

Tina Asher
Business/Career Coach • Trainer • Author
Build U Up Consulting

Take Control of Your Life

Cindy can’t leave her work as an engineer, work that she now finds unfulfilling, because she’ll lose her tenure. Her thought: “I have no control over the system.”

John’s co-worker doesn’t take feedback well, so John works at home each night “cleaning up” the co-worker’s projects so their unit will look better. His thought: “I can’t control how other people are.”

Tracy wants to be promoted to senior management but has been told she doesn’t have what it takes to make the leap. Her thought: “I can’t control what others think of me.”

It’s true. It’s not possible to control a system, another person’s behavior, or others’ impressions. But that doesn’t mean that Cindy, John, or Tracy have no control over their situation. What they—and we—can control ultimately has more power to affect a situation than any control we might try to exert over others.

Consider the power available when we pay attention to these areas—things you can do something about:

Your words. Spoken or written, the words you choose impact your lives and the lives of others. John, for example, could learn ways to approach his colleague that stand a better chance of being heard. (Consider reading Non-Violent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg or Taking the War Out of Our Words by Sharon Ellison.) His cover-up doesn’t help the co-worker, and it takes away from John’s personal time with his wife.

Your beliefs. You can always change your beliefs. Cindy, for example, might want to examine her belief that the only way she can feel financially secure is to have tenure. Or her belief that doing something else that’s fulfilling and stimulating won’t provide well enough for her.

Your actions. You alone are responsible for what you do. Tracy, for example, can find out exactly what leadership and/or managerial qualities her superiors think she lacks. She can take courses to learn skills. She can work with a coach to bring out leadership qualities or to look at other work possibilities.

Your values. What’s important to you is your choice. No one can tell you what to value. Where you truly tap into power is when you align your values with your actions.

Your work. Although many of us complain of being stuck in a job or profession, you do get to choose what your work in the world is. Everything is a choice.

Your friends. Those you associate with say a lot about what you think about yourself. You can choose to have friends who support you and who mirror your best qualities, or friends who bring you down.

Your time. Though it sometimes feels like you have no choice, you do choose daily how you spend the 24 hours given to you.

Your basic health. While you can’t control your genetic make-up, you can choose to exercise, sleep enough, eat healthy food, get routine check-ups, etc.

When you look at these options, you can discover a baseline to empower your day. It becomes clear that you can take control of your life, so where will you begin?

Recommended Reading

If you were to ask me what I’m reading today – the answer would be the same every day, the Bible. It’s my favorite book because I learn something from it every time I read it. If I’m honest, it took a while for me to figure out where to start, what to read, and how to apply it to my life. I started small and then over time God kept opening doors for me to understand Him a little better, and I learned to read and understand it a little bit more. Now I’m addicted to my morning time, soaking in all that I can learn about before starting my day.

Maybe you have felt an urge to read a bit from the Bible or try to understand it a bit more. If that’s you, I’d love to help you take that first step toward that goal.

Reply to this email and let me know if you want to talk. I may not have all the answers, but I have a heart to share what I’ve learned and can get you started.

A friend of mine shared the Life Application Study Bible and that is the one that I’ve learned the most from. Accompanied with prayer and key people in my life, this book has opened many doors to my understanding and knowledge because it lays out a blueprint, or “cliff notes” of what I’m about to read and how to apply it in today’s world. It’s amazing to learn about God and all that He has in store for all of us who believe. I continue to learn and grow the more I read it, and many times, I still have questions, or I learn something new from the same scripture I’ve read repeatedly.

So this month I’m sharing the instruction book of life. The Bible.

If you have been curious, to learn more, I’m always open to talking about where to get started or how to build on your faith journey; it’s one of my favorite topics and there are no silly questions, so let’s chat if you want to explore more together.

Upcoming Event/Promotion

Female first responders or ladies considering the profession, please join us on the weekend of October 4 and 5 at Ignite STL. My husband and I will both be speaking along with some other amazing people who have a passion for helping our first responders thrive in their careers. Please share this with anyone who may be interested in attending. Email me if you have any questions.

Helpful Resources

Managers & Leaders: Download this free guide to discover where you might have opportunities to become a better boss.

Career Help: Unsure about your job? Download this free tool to assess your current career and see where you might be out of balance.

Connect with Me: Ready to transform your career and life? Take the first step toward a brighter future today. Click here to schedule a complimentary Strategy Session, and together, we'll uncover the key steps that will lead you to a more fulfilling and rewarding journey ahead.

Tina Asher
Career Coach • Trainer • Author

With 20+ years in leading, training, sales management, and coaching, Tina Asher brings a broad skillset to helping busy professionals elevate their success. She holds certifications with one of the world's leading sources for science-based, validated assessment and coaching tools. She is a member of the St. Louis National Speakers Association and a graduate of the National Speaker’s Academy. Tina is passionate about serving others to reach their full potential while balancing a full and productive life.

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